Four More Years and Obama's Ears

(Special thanks to Darryl C for his help with this article)

It looks like Jesus has hired Moses to be his personal trainer. Moses Biden, in his first appearance as VP choice looked positively "Cheneyesque" on the podium. If nothing else, Obiden can spend his time between attending funerals explaining to Obama what not to say. Biden, is certainly a scholar. He can quote without attribution many famous and obscure intellectuals which he has often done starting in his college years.

Slow Joe can also educate our Messiah on how to spin a "yes" vote on the war in Iraq into a solid anti-war position. In other words, Biden can help Obama polish his flip-flopping by messaging and softening past statements. Biden's supporters always say that he was "taken out of context." Here's a more distant quote from Biden and an example of how to flip that negative.

In 1987, Biden told New Hampshire voters that he graduated in the "top half" of his class in law school. The fact is that Biden graduated 76 out of 85. How would Biden elegantly explain his way out of that particular gaffe? How about, "I was standing on my head when I said that." It's not so far-fetched when you see that Joe is going to have to explain his solidarity with Hillary on Obama's lack of experience. Hillary you recall, called Obama "naive" and Biden has repeatedly referenced the young savior's lack of experience however obliquely.

Biden can simply say that he was taken out of context. He meant to say that Obama's lack of experience could be tempered by the appropriate guidance counselor occupying the office of Vice President, the office that he said he'd never occupy. Huh?

Today, Joe Biden began work on re-educating Jesus Jr. whose former mentor was the most Christian Jeremiah Wright. With great passion, Joe invoked God's Blessing on America. "God Bless America," Joe said in sharp contrast to Wright's "God***n America."

One thing that can't be taken out of context is Biden's age. After months of Holy O'lers snickering about McCain's advanced age, how do they reconcile the fact that Joe is getting up there in years and will be nearly the ripe old age of 70 toward the end of Barry's first term? Perhaps this can be a positive as Joe's gaffes can be attributed to his advancing senility which ought to really boost the campaign.

This ticket suddenly seems to have morphed from Hope and Change into Hope and Cheney. Will Mr. "higher IQ" actually be running the White House ala Dick? That's the hope and change the starry-eyed disciples must be pining for.